Room Clean-Up and Organization Tips That Actually Work (Even with ADHD)
When I made my bed this morning, a random memory popped into my head.
I was back in my tiny suburban elementary school library, probably in fifth or sixth grade, wandering over to the same shelf I always did. My favorite thing back then was to go to the library during my off periods. Yes, I was that kid.
I don’t remember the book’s title now, but I must have checked it out at least a dozen times. It was already old when I found it ( probably written in the 1960s) and it was all about… cleaning your room.
I know. It’s a little funny for a kid to be obsessed with an organizing book. But it stuck with me because it made something that felt impossible - organizing my mountain of stuff- actually feel clear and doable. It broke everything down into simple, concrete steps.
Decades later, as a psychologist and coach working with women with ADHD and executive function challenges, I still use a version of this framework. It works just as well in adulthood as it did for my messy childhood bedroom.
A note of warning here. DO NOT let yourself go down the rabbit hole with this process. This is a process designed to clean up a discrete room or area, not a strategy for decluttering your entire life.
Why Organization Feels So Hard When You Have ADHD or Executive Function Challenges
For many women with ADHD or executive function challenges, organization tasks can feel overwhelming before they even begin. When your brain is juggling a thousand ideas, looking at a cluttered space can feel like staring at an impossible puzzle.
Executive dysfunction makes starting and sequencing tasks harder. A messy kitchen counter or overflowing closet isn’t just a mess. It’s a wall of invisible decisions:
Where do I start?
What matters most?
What if I get stuck halfway through?
What if I put something in the wrong place?
What if I forget about it after I put it away?
How do I decide what to keep or toss?
These are the moments I come back to that old organizing book. Over the years, I’ve built my own decision framework and process for cleaning and organizing that helps break things down into manageable steps.
This is the same process I use for myself, my kids, and share with the women I support through executive function coaching. And yes, it works just as well for a cluttered bedroom as it does for a chaotic pantry or work bag.
My Decision Making Framework for Organizing Just About Anything
These are the honest, real-life steps I use when I try to tackle cleaning a very messy room in my house. Most recently, I used this approach on my basement after an epic play date made it look like a hurricane came through.
Step 1: Deal With Obvious Trash First, Always
Before anything else, I go through and find what’s definitely trash. The beautiful and satisfying thing about doing this first is there no “real” decisions required.
We’re not making emotional choices yet. Just picking up the candy wrappers, the broken bits, and the obvious junk.
Getting rid of obvious trash first clears the visual clutter and makes everything else feel more manageable.
Doesn’t that feel satisfying?
Step 2 (if applicable): Laundry Next
Next, I sort laundry. Dirty goes in the hamper, clean goes in a pile. That’s it. No folding yet. And thankfully no putting it away yet either (the absolute WORST part of managing laundry in my opinion).
For many of my clients who REALLY struggle with putting clothes away, I often say:
If folding laundry is the mountain that stops you, skip the mountain. Just have two large bins: clean and dirty. Unless you’re the kind of gal who needs a lot of freshly ironed clothes, this approach is better than one pile of who knows what.
Step 3: Sort What’s Left Into Four Piles
Here’s where we really get down to business. Everything that’s left now gets sorted into four piles (make four post-it note tags if that helps you stay organized):
Keep- Not Here: things that don’t belong in this room, but belong in your home
Keep- Here: things you actively use or need to keep in the room you are in
Give Away: things that can be given away or donated
Store: sentimental items that you’re not ready to part with
I know some professionals might cringe at the Store pile. But for lots of people, particularly women with ADHD (or not!), sentimental attachment can stop the whole process. If putting a small amount of things aside for later keeps the process going, I’m all for it.
I usually put my keep pile on the bed, which is brilliant, because I can’t go to sleep until it’s handled. Thank you for that idea, childhood bedroom cleaning book!
Step 4: Bag or Box Up the Give Away Pile
This one should be fairly easy. Simply put your giveaway/donate items in boxes or garbage bags and place where you will remember to actually donate them.
If you need help deciding if something should be donated or trashed, read this. It’s really important to be mindful of who you are giving things to and whether you believe they can really use them. No one wants something gross, broken, or what you would consider to be trash. It just creates more headache for the recipient.
Step 5: Sort the Keep - Not Here Pile by Destination and Bring It There
Once the original four piles are made, I take the Keep- Not Here and sort it again:
Pick up each item and determine what room it needs to go to
Make a separate pile for each room (e.g., bathroom, linen closet, etc.)
Continue until all of the items are sorted
Take each pile to its appropriate room and put away immediately
Step 6: Sort the Keep - Here Pile by Type/Theme and Put It Away
Ironically, the last pile to be organized is the one that stays in the room. However, that’s really quite intentional. When everything else is cleared away, it’s like the volume of the chaos is turned down a notch so that you can really focus on what matters in that particular room.
I take the Keep-Here items and sort them again:
Does the item have a home? If so, put it there now
If the item does not have a home, start to separate by category (e.g., art supplies, tech cords, books, etc.)
Once you have separate piles for each category, then put each pile away in its new home
One pile at a time. One destination at a time.
Warning: When you get to the end of Step 6, you do sometimes realize that your new “homes” are now cramped. Friend…let me tell you honestly…that is a problem for another day and another post. DO NOT get sucked into another tier of decluttering here. Remember the purpose of this strategy- to clean this room (or bag, shelf, etc.), not to declutter your entire life. It’s so easy to start something like this and follow it down another path, only leading to feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with having trouble finishing a single task.
Step 7 (if applicable): Laundry, Revisited
Once the piles are mostly cleared, I tackle the laundry pile. If I have time and energy, I fold and put it away. If not, I rely on my clean vs. dirty bin system that I mentioned above. No shame in practical solutions, especially for those who wear primarily athleisure (I see you, my work at home mamas!).
Step 8: Sentimental Items (The Hard Stuff)
UG. This is often the hardest step. Time to tackle the Store pile.
For many of us, especially women with ADHD, objects carry emotion. When everything has a memory attached to it, it can feel gut wrenching to toss some objects, even if you logically know they have no real purpose in your life anymore.
When I go through my daughter’s room, there’s no way I’m getting rid of the handmade needlepoint stacking blocks from her aunt that she hasn’t used in 3 years. That goes in the sentimental box, even though logically, they could be donated to a small child who would actually use them.
I will definitely recommend that you keep your sentimental storage box small on purpose. I do this not to erase memories, but to set gentle boundaries for myself and offer this for my clients as well. Your memories will stay with you long after the items are gone.
It’s OK to love things. It’s OK to get rid of things. It’s also OK to decide you’re not sure what the heck you want to do with something and revisit it later.
Why This System Works for Women with ADHD or Executive Function Challenges
This straightforward decision making framework works because it removes decision overload at each step and allows some quick wins right at the beginning.
Trash first → zero decisions
Laundry basic sort next → low-stakes task
Four piles → simplifies emotional choices
Destination sorting → reduces chaos and removes things from your field of vision
Sentimental box → respects your feelings- it’s ok to love your stuff sometimes
Instead of staring at an overwhelming mess and thinking of it as an abstract and unclear task, you’re moving through a clear, predictable sequence. That’s what executive function support is all about.
And importantly…please know the goal here isn’t Pinterest-perfect organizing. This is real-world organizing for real people, especially women trying to manage households, careers, and ADHD or executive function challenges all at once.
Executive Function Skills at Work
If you look closely, this little organizing system flexes several key executive function skills:
Task initiation (your inner (Tina): Start with the simplest action (trash).
Organization & planning (your inner Theresa and Penelope): Clear steps, clear categories.
Emotional control (your inner Rita): Making decisions around sentimental items gently, not with pressure.
Working memory (your inner Wendy): Staying focused on one pile at a time.
Flexibility (your inner Sydney): Allowing for systems that actually fit your life.
These are the same kinds of skills I help women strengthen through my executive function skill coaching and workshops. When we make organization more approachable, it builds confidence, and that confidence often spills into other areas of life.
Your Space Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect, Just Functional
I’ll be honest: This system doesn’t make your home look like a magazine spread. Sometimes I wish it did, but honestly, that would only last for like 10 seconds in my house anyway.
But it will get you from “I don’t know where to start” to “I can breathe again.”
That’s what matters most. Organization for women with ADHD and executive function challenges isn’t about perfection. It’s about creating a process that actually works for your brain.
So the next time you’re staring at a messy kitchen, overflowing closet, or cluttered bedroom, channel your inner elementary school Liz (the girl who loved a good library book about cleaning rooms). Start with trash. Build from there.
And remember: progress counts more than perfection.
If You’re Ready to Build More Supportive Systems
If executive dysfunction is making everyday life feel harder than it needs to be, you don’t have to figure it out alone.
This kind of executive function skill coaching for women can help you build sustainable, realistic systems that work with your brain, not against it.
👉 Learn more about my courses, group coaching and tools designed for women navigating ADHD and executive function challenge by signing up for my newsletter or reaching out today.
Disclaimer: While Dr. Liz is a licensed psychologist, the information provided herein is intended solely for educational purposes. Services offered by Empowered Focus, LLC are not to be considered a substitute for mental health therapy. Individuals requiring mental health therapy are advised to seek support from a qualified mental health provider in their respective localities. A valuable resource for locating such providers is Psychology Today.